Day 28

Day 28: A picture of you from last year and now, how have you changed.

How have I changed physically? I'm up a few ell bees... I plan on working on that. My hair was darker. (This is the only picture I have of me in November of last year. It was my first deer hunt in Texas.)
But aside from physical changes a lot of other stuff has changed.

I sleep less. I worry more. I talk baby now. I plan backwards. I.e. If I have a doctor appointment at noon. I change his diaper and clothes by 11:30. I have the bag and a bottle ready by 11:15. Garrett eats at 11:00. I shower by 10:00. I try to get him to go down for a nap by 9:45. It works quite well. (All new moms should plan their day backwards, it helps you be on time to things.) I multi-task better. I feel more responsible. I'm less scared of the dark.

I don't think I've matured much in the past year. I feel more like a grown-up, and I've had to make some hard grown-up decisions, but when do you really become 'grown-up'? I don't think anyone really grows up, we just learn how to act in public.

I'm still scared of spiders. I still like lucky charms, but mostly just the marshmallows. I still run from bees. I still sometimes cry when I think about living far away from my mom. I still sometimes wipe my mouth on my sleeve. And if there's not a burp cloth close, I wipe Garrett's mouth on my sleeve too. I laugh when things sound sexual when they aren't suppose to. I have a pillow that I can't sleep without. I sometimes eat fruit snacks and when I buy them it takes me a while to decide on a theme- nemo, princesses, batman, scooby-doo, etc.

Speaking of 'grown-up' decisions, the little G man slept in him own room last night. It was so hard for me! I feel like its long overdo. I don't know how long babies who start in a bassinet should sleep in one, (I always said no more than a month) but he's 2 months old and I still didn't feel ready. I knew he'd do fine, this one was all me. Paul really stepped up and took over last night. I've had some good excuses for putting it off for the past month. The swamp cooler is in his window and needed to be winterized. I'd mention it to Paul once in a while but I didn't mind that it wasn't done because it kept Garrett in our room. Within a day of Paul doing it, our heater started going out. We played phone tag with my old boss (landlord) for a few days and finally got in contact with a guy to come fix it, but it took a week or so to make it happen and everyday our house felt colder. We bought a nice space heater for our room which was my next good excuse to keep Sweet G with me. After the heater got fixed we went to California for 10 days. We got back last night, and I was officially out of excuses. Paul insisted. I worried. There's a cute board above the swamp cooler to cover the ugly insulation stuff, its been there just fine for 7 months but of course last night I worried it might fall on G. I wondered if the windows were locked. I worried that the heater vent on the floor in the back corner of his crib would be too warm. I wondered if there was still a cold draft from the cooler. I worried our monitor might not work right and I wouldn't hear him. All my worrying paid off! He's been in there asleep for over 9 hours and I can just now hear him starting to wake up. (My Grandma had a quote on her fridge when I was young that I think about a lot these day. "I know worrying works, because 90% of the things I worry about never happen.")