Tuesday, April 29, 2014

The first couple weeks with three...

Our hospital stay with Charlie was longer than with Addie. Addie was born around 5pm and we were headed home less than 24 hours later. Charlie was born close to 1am and we stayed three nights (including that night, even though we didn't get to our postpartum room until around 4am, it still felt like three nights.) She had to be under lights for jaundice for 24 hours. It was a long 24 hours. Mostly because we were all three awake most of that time. I only got to take her out to nurse her and I felt like the meanest mom ever taking her blanket and skin to skin warmth away, only to put the protective eye wear back on her and lay her under the lights with nothing to comfort her but a binky. Our room was really cool. We tried to change the temperature but had no luck. The lights aren't heat lights and we could tell that Charlie was cold. Around 1am Paul had had enough. He'd been asleep for a couple hours but knew I was struggling watching Charlie struggle. And all I could do was reinsert the binky. They even told me to keep my hands out from under the lights so I wouldn't cast a shadow on her and keep her from getting all the treatment she could. Paul told me he was going to 7-11 to buy a coffee and then he'd take over for the night so I could sleep. He was gone for about an hour and came back with a coffee and a bag full of stuff. Most of the stuff were snacks from the gas station, but at the bottom of the bag was a heated rice bag. He'd driven home and searched through our dark house full of sleeping people and found a rice bag. He heated it and then snuck it into our room. I don't know if the nurses would have allowed it had he asked, but they told us not to put anything in with the baby. Paul tucked the warm bag around Charlie's little feet and she almost instantly calmed down and fell right to sleep. And that's the man I married. 

We survived the lights. Our pediatrician ordered a formula supplement during the night because I didn't have enough milk yet and she hadn't peed in 46 hours. We gave her about an ounce and her numbers improved my morning and she peed so we didn't have to stay longer or take her home with lights. 

The day after we got home Addie came down with a fever. And we didn't realize it until she'd been holding Charlie for two hours. That sent me into a mild panic. She was over 102 for three days. On the third day of her fever, Charlie had a doctors appointment to check her weight. So I took Addie with us to be checked out. There was nothing they could do for her, and of course they told us to keep her away from the baby. That became a full-time job, because Addie has wanted to be right next to, holding, touching, kissing Charlie since day one. Her fever finally broke, and none of the rest of us came down with anything. So after a couple of days of being paranoid I finally let Addie get close to Charlie again. And right after I let her near the baby, she came down with a cold. Addie passed it to me, then Garrett got it, and then Charlie got it. Less than two weeks old and she had her first cold. Fortunately, Charlie's was very mild and she got over it quickly. Garrett seemed to struggle with it the longest. He's just finally stopped coughing the past couple of days. It's such a struggle keeping two toddlers away from a baby. Let alone keeping them from touching her blankets, pacifiers, clothes, my breast pump bottles, etc. For almost a month I've either been saying "don't touch that!" or "get away from her face!" or I've been washing things that they touched. The miraculous thing though, is that I haven't been too stressed. 

So far, this new baby experience has been much different than my first two. I'm keeping up on housework better, I'm finding time to shower, I'm sleeping better... I'm just enjoying being a mom at this moment more than I ever have. (And even though Garrett and Addie absolutely adore the baby, I'll save my thoughts on them and their weird behavior that I can only assume has something to do with adjusting to a new little one, for another day.)

Addie held her hand up and said, "look, I'm glowing." 
By day three, these two (especially Addie) were ready for mom to come home. And I was ready too!

I made a dozen of these jars a few days before Charlie was born to give to my nurses. They were a big hit! 


The first car ride picture. 





First bath at home. She looks content here because I think this picture was taken seconds before she pooped.  She doesn't love bath time so far.

It's been much easier this time around to forget the to-dos and just sit and hold my baby. And I'm enjoying the newborn phase more this time. 




We even made it out for a beach day while Mimi was still in town. 









Charlie slept the whole time. 
Mimi was with us for two weeks, and then I had to start making it through the days on my own with all three. 

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Charlie's birth story

I started this when my baby girl was one week old. And I was already finding that I was forgetting some details of her birth. Now she's three and a half weeks old and I'm finally finishing. Really I waited because I wanted to upload some camera pictures, not just phone ones. Still haven't done that but I'm posting it anyway.

It started the evening of March 27th. I guess technically it was March 28th, because it was just after midnight that the contractions started. They were 10 minutes apart, and I never woke Paul because I'm no stranger to early/false/long labors. It went on for about five hours and then stopped. When Paul got up for work I asked him how his schedule looked that day, and he immediately said "are you having contractions?" I told him about my night, but that I wasn't expecting anything to happen that day. The kids and I went about our day. A long walk, a stop at the farmers market, and a late breakfast at Coffee Bean. Paul and I took the kids to dinner that night, and during dinner I had a few random contractions. It was nothing worth timing, and that night I went to bed with no thoughts or expectations of a baby coming anytime soon. At 1 AM Saturday morning the contractions started again. Five minutes apart for four hours. They were really short but really intense. Kind of the way I would describe the earthquakes we were experiencing that whole night as well. I woke Paul a little after five, when contractions were getting as close as three minutes apart. Still always lasting less than a minute. By the time I got in the shower at 6 AM, it felt like one continuous contraction. I called my father-in-law at 6:30 and they headed right over. Paul and I were in the car on the way to the hospital by 7 AM. And just like my previous two pregnancies, as soon as I had a visual of the hospital everything stopped. I diagnosed myself with a made-up condition called shy uterus. I was on the monitors for about an hour and in that time only had three contractions. But I was having contraction coupling like I had with Garrett. A couple really short painless contractions in between the bigger ones. Two nights of false labor and my really painful morning, got me nowhere. I was only 1 cm and 50% effaced. None of my contractions were lasting long enough to make any progress. But they really really hurt, and I hoped that that would count for something. 

I was home by about 9am. More contractions. Took a bath. Tried to sleep. We ended up going back to the hospital around noon, but not for me. Paul's family from out of town ended up in the hospital. Paul's cousin has some health issues and was admitted for a couple of days so we went to visit with him and the family. Apparently I looked really pregnant and in pain because when we got off the elevator a nurse said, "oh, umm... Are you?... Do you know where you're going??" I said, "yes, not in labor. I wish." I has contractions all. day. long. Sometimes three an hour. Sometimes one an hour. Sometimes 3 in ten minutes. Some would make me stop and hold on to something. Some I could talk right through. We all went to lunch. We went back to visit at the hospital more. 

Finally at about 5pm we decided to head to the in-laws and pick up the kids. But on the way down the elevator I had a mini meltdown. I couldn't do this again all night. I asked Paul if we could make a stop in labor and delivery. Instead, we sat in the lobby and called our favorite L and D nurse who unfortunately had the day off. She talked me off a ledge. And just as we got off the phone with her, Paul's cousin was discharged and he and his mom needed a ride home. (Sorry, long and boring, but things like this I love reading and remembering all the details.) We packed them up and headed to the in laws. (We had to wait for the elevators to start working again to get him to the main floor after a couple of earthquakes.) 

After being at the in-laws about an hour I went outside and called the on call doctor. 

Remember when Addie was born and I said I always wanted a women doc but there was one in the team of docs that I really hoped wouldn't be on call when I had Addie and sure enough, it was her? Yeah, same story. But this time with the male doctors. 

When I learned that morning that Dr. R had just come on and was on for the next 24 hours my heart sunk. Not only is California the c-section capital of America (in my opinion) Dr. R is the c-section king of the hospital I deliver at. When he got on the phone with me I fought back tears and told him about the day I'd had. He very matter of factly gave me two options. 1. Come in for a morphine rest. It will do one of three things. 1- stop everything and give you relief until whenever it starts again. 2- stop false labor and start real labor. 3- do nothing at all. And my second option. Be induced. And the first thing out of his mouth was. "Of course induction always raises the chance of a c-section." Those were the words I didn't want to hear from him. Don't jump right to that so casually! I broke out in tears after I got off the phone. Unfortunately Garrett and Addie saw me so I tried to pull it together. We said a family prayer and as Paul and I were walking to the car, Garrett ran out and gave me a big hug and said, "Good luck!" 

The whole drive to the hospital I kept asking Paul what we should do. I knew I wouldn't be dilated because I was still having short sporadic contractions and it had been the same all day. But I knew if I got on a 'morphine rest' I'd be frustrated the whole time and just get more worn out, but I felt like if I didn't progress fast on pitocin, the doc would section me prematurely/unnecessarily. I think I was bouncing in the seat and praying for big bumps hoping my water would break on the way. No such luck. 

I got checked in. And yes, shy uterus kicked in and nothing happened the whole 45 minutes of waiting. We finally got all hooked up and the nurse said, "ok, let me check you and then that will help you make a decision." I prayed, "please be a three, please be a three..." Then I got less picky, "please be anything but one, please be anything but one..." 

FIVE. I WAS FIVE CENTEMETERS!! I was so happy. Within a minute the doc was in my room doing fist pumps into the air. He said, "This makes our decision easy. Lets get you in a delivery room a break your water to get some consistent contractions going." 

So now, on to the birth story...

At 7:30pm the doc broke my water. Contractions started immediately and by 8:00 I was at a 6. I sat in a rocking chair for an hour and the pain got intense. I walked a little. Went to the bathroom. Swore a lot. Prayed a lot. At 9:15 I asked for an epidural. Or yelled or cried for one. The anesthesiologist was in a c-section and there was one other request ahead of me. So I grouned and swore until 10:30pm and finally got an epi. (That only worked on the left side for the first hour.) A couple of minutes after I got it, we had an earthquake. I think there were something like 200 earthquakes the weekend Charlie was born. And a couple dozen of them that we really felt and got a little freaked out by. Me getting meds is Paul's green light to fall asleep. He was out, and another earthquake hit. It really scared me, and Paul slept through it. I started to panic. What if 'the big one' hits and I'm totally dependent on others helping me if we have to evacuate?! I started to try and un-numb myself by wiggling my toes and trying to do kegels. It started to feel hard to breath. I tried to wake Paul and I started to pray. I instantly had peace come over me. My breathing regulated and I was able to relax and 'enjoy' the pressure of the contractions. I prayed a lot. I talked to Charlie. I thought a lot about my Grandparents and uncle who have passed away. I was completely surrounded by a calming and peaceful feeling. Paul finally woke up and prayed with me. I had very specific prayers during the whole process and God was very present and faithful throughout. One very specific was about my rib. I'd had constant pain for over three weeks. Some days were better than others. And some days it was nearly impossible to breath. As soon as my water was broken the rib pain completely stopped. All through labor and delivery I felt no pain in my ribs. And even now, almost four weeks later, the pain has never returned. 

Back to my story... A minute later the doc checked me. I was complete! 10cm and 100% effaced. But baby was still a little high so we waited 45 minutes and checked again. During that time they gave me a little pitocin to lengthen contractions. The nurse checked me this time. Charlie was lower but she suggested we wait a bit more.

We'd really warmed up to the doctor. He's in the Lions club with Paul but is never able to attend because of his schedule so Paul had to remind him that he was in the club and they got talking about a few guys they both know. They made bets about what time I'd deliver, how much she'd weigh and how long I'd have to push. It was nice that the doc always had something to talk about/joke about every time he came in. Much different than earlier that morning and talking to him on the phone. 

Dr R came in right after the nurse checked me and she told him she thought we should wait. Dr R kind of ignored her, and literally laid across the foot of the bed, got all up in there and checked me. He said, "ok, do half a push for me and let's see if she comes down." Sure enough, she did. "Let's get this baby out!" he excitedly shouted. Within a minute, he was scrubbing up, having a catch tray brought in, putting me in the stirrups, lowing the spotlight from the ceiling, and reminding Paul how to push up on my foot when I pushed. A contraction started and I pushed! Her head was out on the first push. The umbilical cord was around her neck a couple of times so he quickly cut it and suctioned for a second. I did a half push ad she was out. From, "It's push time!" To, baby on my chest, was less than three minutes. Charlie Raelene White entered the world at 12:45am on March 30, 2014. (Missed her due date by 46 minutes.) Weighing 7lbs. 11oz. and 20.25 inches long. (I question the length because a week later at the pediatrician she was 19.75 inches.) She was perfect, and she was a SHE! It still felt like a surprise, even though I'd been told that all along. 

Aside from the rough couple of nights leading up to labor, she was the quickest and smoothest delivery yet. And even with all the pain and exhaustion, I still love going into labor.  I love wondering when it will happen.  I love having contractions at home and waiting for things to progress.  It's so cool that our bodies just know when it's time, I just with mine would know, and keep knowing without assistance.  But of course it's always worth it!  I love this girl.  






Thursday, March 27, 2014

Waiting...

I wanted Garrett to come early because he was my first and I was excited.

I wanted Addie to come on 11/11/11 because, it's cool. And it's Paul's birthday. 

Neither happened. Both late. 

I've thought this one would come early because she's so low, and so, low. At 35 weeks I couldn't image going till 40 weeks. But here I am, 2 days from her ETA, and no signs pointing to an early baby. And I'm just fine with that. Actually I'm even ok with her being a couple of days late. Mostly because everyday, my rib feels a little better and I want to give that as much time as possible. And also, because Paul has family in town from Colorado for Poppy's birthday. There will be at least 8 visitors here on my due date for a party. And people coming and going for a couple of days after. I know they'd all love to be here when the baby's born, but it all sounds chaotic to me. I'd rather have a slow and easy going time getting the kids ready for grandparent sleepovers, etc. 

But, like most women who stay pregnant for 40+ weeks, that week leading up to the due date goes by sooo slooow. Paul's had a crazy busy week and everyday he has some commitment that makes him say, "please don't go into labor tomorrow." So far so good. I haven't made any plans or commitments this week, just in case. So that also means I've been really bored. My rib caused me to take it easy for long enough that I started feeling really lazy. So this week I've been busy. My rib hurts the most if I'm laying down, so I've spent a lot of time sitting at my sewing machine and standing in my kitchen. In the past four days I've made three dresses, six baby hair bows and headbands, three headbands for myself, and two receiving blankets. I've also made 22 freezer meals, with a couple more planned after I finish this post, and two batches of cake pops. 

I also spent a lot of time today thinking about how all of my boy newborn clothes are in Utah, and what if I need my parents to bring them out, just in case… A coworker of Paul's got a new nephew yesterday and they were told throughout the pregnancy that it was a girl. His coworker knows how shocked I was to find out it was a girl so he wanted to make sure that Paul shared that with me yesterday just to stress me out again. It really doesn't stress me out much, the thought of it being a boy. But once you have the idea in your head of what it is it still would be really weird if it ended up being a boy. Anyway, that's all, just waiting, rambling, passing time...




Oh and the kids and I killed some time at Target and at Wendy's this week on a lunch date. I love these two.  Addie chases Garrett around all the time trying to massage his shoulders.  She chants in a high voice, "massage, massage, massage!" And they both laugh.  She told me he needed a chicken nugget massage.




Friday, March 21, 2014

Making room for one more. (And toddler sleep patterns.)

We almost gave up our guest room. We almost put the baby in Addie's room (and kicked Addie out) which is essentially a walk in-closet in our room. But since I wake up at the sound of kids breathing, and I haven't slept well (in our room) since Addie was born, and was finding myself sleeping in the guest room too often. We still kicked Addie out, but made her room a little office for Paul. No pictures of that, but just imagine a little brown and tan office, full of computer stuff and files, a buffalo leg lamp, and a deer head mounted on the one and only wall that you can see from our room, (that's location I did not approve of), and that's Paul's office. 

We moved our craft/storage room to an old file room that we acquired from the business. We added a new wall and door to close off the old craft room and made that a shared room for the older two. We made Garrett's old room the new nursery. And the guest room stayed the same. 

It was a lot of work, but went a lot faster than I expected it would. Thankfully the in-laws did the building part, my mom did most of the painting, and Paul and my mom did most of the room moving. So I supervised and worked on the details. (Perks of pregnancy.) 

Here is the finished nursery. The walls used to be light blue. We painted them gray with a yellow and gray stripe. All I did was the stripes. 
 There's only one of our 5 rooms that have a closet so we get creative. 

I love decorating and redecorating rooms. I can't imagine what I'd do if we had big rooms for the kids, so for now it's probably good that they're really small. I pointed out this time around that in three years I did Garrett's room twice, Addie's room twice, the new nursery, and the toddlers' room both complete. As well as changing our second living room into a playroom, and I've changed the guest room twice. And I've never actually completed the master bedroom. I don't know why. But maybe that'll be my project after the baby is born and I have all the time in the world. 

Anyway, here is the toddlers woodlands themed room. My inspiration for this room was Garrett's bed that frustrated me for 5 months. We bought a nicer mattress than the standard IKEA ones, and when we got the bed fully put together and put the mattress on, it was too thick for him to be able to lay on top safely. We almost bought an IKEA one, but then I realized 4 or 5 inches of wood above the mattress was not enough to keep the kids safe who would inevitably climb on the bed and push each other off. So I went to Pinterest for Plan B. And found so many cute treehouse themed beds made using this bed that we got at IKEA. Paul made it all come together and I couldn't be happier with it. The treehouse façade is in two pieces and they lift off of the frame. Not easy enough that the kids can lift them off, but easy enough for us to remove to change sheets or grab Garrett in an emergency. And Garrett loves it! 

Here's the before:
And the afters:

The wall colors in this room are a little crazy. We didn't want to buy any paint so we went with what we had. Just enough green for the two big walls, and barely enough light blue for the wall behind the treehouse. I was going to do the other wall tan, but Garrett had insisted for weeks before we even started construction that he wanted a red wall. Lucky for him, we had red paint so I just went with it. And I actually think it looks really cute.

I love this room. And the kids have so much fun in here. If they wake up too early I tell them to get some books and climb under the bed and read, and they do it! And I often find them playing in there when I think they're in the playroom. Fortunately, all the fun stuff hasn't become a sleep distraction. Since these pictures were taken, we have now converted Addie's bed to a toddler bed. Because after the first couple of weeks of sharing a room and talking each other to sleep, Addie was getting a little restless. Garrett would fall asleep, or want to fall asleep, and Addie was keeping him awake. We'd hear him telling her to be quiet. Then she would get frustrated and cry. It went on and on and eventually Addie was in tears every night and Garrett was exhausted and mad. Sometimes for up to two hours we would listen to this. For some reason I thought it would be worth a try to switch her to her toddler bed. Maybe to make her feel like she had the same freedoms that Garrett had even though I hoped she wouldn't abuse them. Well, the falling asleep part has been amazing. She hasn't gotten out of her bed once. And we switched her about a week ago. They chit chat a little and both drift off to sleep. But just about every other night now, Addie has woken up between 3 and 4 AM calling out for a drink. Even then, she doesn't get out of her bed, she just calls for us to bring her something. It's frustrating, but we can quiet her down and she falls right back to sleep. Garrett always sleeps through her early morning requests. And he still almost always falls asleep first, and sleeps in longer. If only every child slept as well as he always has... 

Anyway, I guess we're pretty much ready. 

Impromptu Mimi Time

So my injured rib went from bad, to a tiny little bit better, to worse. I was having a hard time breathing and could hardly stand up. I think I went 5 full days feeling desperate to yawn, but wasn't able too. I called my mom on the worst day, mostly to tell her we bought a new computer so she has something fast and reliable now to work on when she's here and working remotely. But I never made it to that part before bursting into tears about the pain I was in. And wow, it hurt so bad to cry. A couple hours later she'd booked a flight and was here the next afternoon. I don't know what I would have done without her help. She did so much! Meal prep, cleaning, laundry, freezer meal making, helped get the house picked up for carpet cleaners, playing with the kids, let me sleep in... I could go on and on. 
She was here for six days and I was feeling so much better by the time she had to go. Still not 100% and still taking it really easy. No lifting, light on the house work, really short walks. My doc says it'll be painful until after the baby's born so I've accepted that. And now I just wait. 
We decided to take the toddler bed plunge while my mom was here, in hopes that Addie would fall asleep when we put her to bed instead of complaining for two hours. So far so (kind of) good. More on that later. 






The carpet cleaners were at our house for about 5 hours on St. Patrick's day so we tried to stay out as long as possible. 



I had a doctor appointment that afternoon and my mom prepped our festive meal. 

The kids sure love her and are already courting down to the next visit. They practice their "baby is here" phone call to her, and Garrett asks several times a day, "now is the baby getting born??" 

Thanks Mom! We love you. 

Thursday, March 13, 2014

The car accident.

A fender bender really. Maybe a little harder impact and slightly more damage (mostly to the other driver's Mercedes SUV who was at fault) than a small stop-and-go fender bender, but not bad.

The good news is (well aside from the fact that it was just annoying when it happened) everything about it is good news. We were in my FIL's SUV. And his two dogs had recently used the corners of his bumper as a giant chew toy. It looked awful. He'd had a couple quotes already but just hadn't gotten around to actually replacing it, so someone else damaging it more, and even better, someone else paying for the new one was great news to him. 

No one was seriously injured. I had a sore neck and Addie had a couple rough nights of sleep and said her back hurt, so she and I went to the chiropractor and she's been fine since. (Me, not so much, but it's not because of the accident.) 

I spent a few hours in labor and delivery because I have B- blood type, and if my blood were to mix with the baby's blood and she doesn't have the same type as me then my body would treat the baby as a virus. I called my doctor right after the accident and she advised me to go to labor and delivery for blood work and heart monitoring just to be safe. Everything turned out fine. I forgot to mention that there were seven of us in the car, our friends from Chicago and their two-year-old were with us. So they watched our kids while we were at the hospital. And even the hospital ended up being a good experience because I had recently learned that the head of labor and delivery who I fell in love with when I was delivering Addie, has been promoted to a different job. I was so sad when I learned this, because I know I got good treatment because of her, because she and Paul and my father-in-law had connected a few months before and become good friends. Anyway, on this visit, through conversation with the nurse who was taking care of me, I learned that she is the sister of the former head of the department. And she called her sister while I was there and her sister told her great things about the White family. So again, I got great treatment and I'm really not nervous about delivery now because I met several nurses through her and I'm feeling comfortable again. 

Other good things: My FIL got a rental car at no cost while his is being fixed and he's getting a free bumper so he's glad he procrastinated. 

The insurance informed us that we need to replace all three car seats that were in the car. I feel kind of funny about this because it didn't seem like there could've been any damage done to the car seats, and I really don't understand that rule. When he told us that, I remembered hearing that before but I would've never thought of it. There's no price restriction. They just trust that we'll replace them at close to what we paid for them (and we did) and we send in the receipts for full reimbursement. 

I had a medical adjuster from the company come get a statement from me about my hospital visit and both mine and Addie's chiropractic care, which honestly, I wasn't too concerned about needing to pay all or at least part of. But, not only are they paying back 100% of our already paid for chiropractor visits, but they are paying 100% of my hospital visit AND if Addie and I go again (I told her maybe one or two more times), I fax the receipt to her and she'll send me a check. AND, both Addie and I got 'pain and suffering' settlement checks. I couldn't believe this part. I kept asking, "do I save this money to go toward something that is over the amount of something you don't pay?" Or "is this money I pay to the hospital?" I probably sounded so dumb. She finally said, "in California if you're in an accident that requires any medical care you are entitled to money for your pain and suffering." I was still so surprised, so I said, "Both Addison and I??" I went onto say, "I just feel like this is very generous for such a minor accident. We're really fine." But she didn't miss a beat, and continued to write two checks. After she left, I called Paul to share the great and surprising news, and he said, "Insurance companies are just happy when people are willing to settle and don't fight for more. That money is nothing to them." Maybe nothing to them, but to me it's a new pack n play, a video monitor, and the laptop that Santa forgot to bring me. Plus a bit more in savings. I still feel weird about it, and I've never been in an accident to know if this is normal, but I'm thankful for how kind and helpful the insurance company has been. I'm not wishing for more accidents, but this has been a really good experience overall with very little inconvenience and very little 'pain and suffering'.

Ok, that last part isn't true, about the pain and suffering. I've been in pain since my visit to the chiropractor following the accident, but it's not accident related. My chiropractor accidentally dislocated one of my ribs. 38 weeks pregnant with a dislocated rib.  It's worse than contractions and its gotten worse over the last couple days. I went back to him yesterday, nearly in tears and it was out again. He popped it back in but still no relief. I'm going back to him Friday and maybe to my regular doctor for any help on pregnancy safe pain killers. I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed.