it's me, andrea.

visitors from utah and alaska

2012-02-13T22:08:00.011-07:00

My brother and his wife came to California to spend a couple days at Disneyland with her family, but they stayed with us and we got to spend a couple days with them too. It happened to be the week before Garrett's surgery and my parents were planning to come out during that time anyway, so we had a full house but it worked out perfectly.

Garrett is my little helper boy. He wants to assist with everything from laundry, to garbage, to sweeping and dusting. He really slows me down, but I try and be patient because he's always so proud of himself when I say "Thank you for helping!" He smiles and bounds around so happy looking for the next thing to do.We met up with Tay and Sam at Disneyland one evening for a couple of hours.We went on a picnic with Grammy and Grandpa.We had a pizza party and everyone got to make their own. Garrett loved being able to do whatever he wanted with his pizza. Playing with food was finally allowed and he loved it.Yep, he must be my kid. :)He was so happy when Grammy helped him put the baby carrier on with his puppy inside. He couldn't quite figure it out on his own.His favorite book that I got at a library sale for a quarter. We read it over, and over, and over... Even Garrett has it memorized and he's made up little actions for different parts of the story.We went to the Santa Monica Pier. Watching Garrett torment these pigeons was the highlight of the day. He was fearless, walking through them, grabbing their tails, scaring them away. Even getting flapped in the face didn't stop him.We had a Super Bowl party. I dressed the kids as footballs. And as you can see, Garrett was so thrilled about it that he was overcome with emotion.Garrett had his surgery (that I already wrote about) on Monday the 6th. Tay, Sam and my dad all left that day. My mom had a ticket to leave that Wednesday, but because of Garrett's strict schedule of soaking in the tub several times a day, ointments, medicine, etc, she decided to stay til Saturday night. I'm SO thankful she did. Thankfully the kid loves the tub, but it was very time consuming. I only gave him one bath that week and he had about 20 over those 4 or 5 days. Thank you Grammy!And just a few things I maybe never mentioned. I had mastitis again a few weeks ago and had to take an antibiotic again. I also took a milk thinner to help push the infection through, and a milk producer to help with a low supply on one side because of a damaged milk duct when I had a lump removed after Garrett was born. Addie had a clogged tear duct and had drops for a few days because it was slightly infected. She also is taking her tummy drops, just twice a day, not 6 times, and she's had a great couple of days. We also tried gripe water with her too. And then Garrett... Pain meds, pro-biotics, laxatives, ointments... Glad Paul is healthy! Actually we are all very healthy, but looking at my counter top at the moment, you'd think otherwise.

Colic

2012-02-11T09:07:00.001-07:00

When Addie was born I said she 'wasn't a crier'. The older she's gotten the more fussy she's become. People we hang out with who didn't know Garrett as a baby are surprised when I say I think she's pretty fussy. My mom pointed out last week that I was really spoiled with Garrett and that Addie's fussiness is that of a pretty normal baby. But over the past few days it's gotten worse and worse. Most days lately she's too uncomfortable and upset for me to nurse, so I pump and then getting her to take the bottle is a challenge, too. A lot of back arching, grunting, leg kicking, gas, head flailing, etc. It got bad enough yesterday that I had to leave for a few minutes. My mom insisted and I'm so thankful she was here. Garrett and I went and got frozen yogurt. When we got back the crying was still going on. My mom took over again and sent me to bed in tears. Paul got home and my mom insisted that he and I go to dinner. Addie was falling asleep as we left so I felt ok about it. But when we got home my mom said she's had a pretty rough hour or so of inconsolable crying. It began again when we got home. It wasn't normal. I was worried and overwhelmed. I wanted to go to Instacare. Paul was a little less urgent. But even my mom, (who admits that we never went to the doctor as babies for anything), told Paul she really thinks Addie's in pain, and that we should probably go, even if just for my own peace of mind. (She'd woken up 5 times in 8 hours the night before, and she'd only napped for about an hour total all day yesterday. She's not a great napper, but the nights are never that rough, and we usually get about 3 hours worth of naps a day.)

We loaded up and headed to the Instacare. The doctor checked everything, and ruled out everything, except Colic. I thought Colic started in the first couple weeks, (and maybe it did, just not so bad) but I've read all kinds of things now like, it can start anywhere from birth to 5 months. Most babies though, are over it around 4 months, it peaks between 3 and 4 months, it can last up to 6 months. Once diagnosed, the worst of it lasts 2-3 weeks. Etc. I think a lot of parents self diagnose their babies with Colic when they have a fussy day or two, and I'm sure a lot of doctors over-diagnose babies with Colic when everything else checks out normal. But there's been a big enough change in Addie this week, that I feel pretty confident about what the doctor said.

As we were leaving last night with a "Good luck" and an "I'm so sorry", another doc overheard us and told us about some prescription tummy drops to try. They sent it into CVS and we gave her some last night. She was out of control screaming when we got home, but when we got her calm enough to take the drops she calmed right down ans started cooing and smiling. Maybe a fluke...but it sure was nice. We swaddled and fed her and she went right to sleep, and only woke once in 11 hours for a quick and calm breastfeed, and is still asleep now. I'm sure there are some rough days ahead, but I know it won't last.

In the meantime, I'm coming up with a plan to handle it the best we can. That plan includes several one on one dates with Garrett. He's such a tender little sweetie.

Surgery Day

2012-02-06T20:26:00.000-07:00

I mentioned a few days ago that today was surgery day for Garrett, and that we probably would have to cancel it. Although he still had a bit of a runny nose this morning and some little coughs, his lungs were "as clear as a bell", and we were able to go ahead with the surgery. It's done!

So here's how the day went:

First off, let me tell you what the surgery was for. Garrett was born with penoscrotal webbing, or 'webbed penis'. Both Urologists took about 3 seconds to identify that as the problem. Both said it was a simple fix. I mentioned before that if we'd stayed in Utah, Garrett would have had it done when he was 6 months old. But because we moved to California, and we were referred to 'one of the worlds best pediatric urologists', (according to our nurse, kids come from all over the world to have surgeries done by Dr. K. He's super gentle with the kids and he knows exactly what he'd doing, and was very good at explaining everything to Paul and I to put us at ease. And he's a handsome Egyptian) it was no surprise to the nurse that we'd started this process a year ago. (Who knows if all the nurse said about him is true, but it makes a mom feel good when its about the guy who is cutting into your kid's delicates.)

We left the house at 5:15AM. As I was packing up, Paul kind of looked at me funny, and I'm sure he was thinking, "This is an OUT patient surgery." But he didn't say anything. I wanted G to be comfortable, and have things he was familiar with. So I took his favorite book, his favorite race car, a bottle, a snack, a blanket, his snuggly, a fresh sleeper, and some books and items from a get well package from his "Uncle" Jordon and "Aunt" Katie.

We got to CHOC (Children's Hospital of Orange County) at 6:00AM for pre-op and surgery was at 7:30AM. The room was full of toys that Garrett and another little boy got to play with while the nurse went over everything with Paul and I. We signed a lot of paper work. The Anesthesiologist came in and met us and explained what she'd be doing. The O.R. nurse came in to let us know that she'd be with Garrett the whole time. The 7 foot + resident doctor came in to meet us. (Wow, he was tall.) Another doctor came in and re-asked us all the questions about allergies, past surgeries, illness...don't really remember why. And the doctor came in. Every one shook our hands, had very happy 'good-mornings' for us, greeted Garrett- usually by bending down to his level and trying to get a wave or a smile. Which I loved, by the way. If you're going to be taking my kid from me to a strange place without me, you better be nice and friendly when you meet him before you take him away. (One nurse bugged me, I'll get to that.)About 20 minutes before they took him back we changed him into a hospital gown and they gave him some medicine. It caused temporary amnesia and mild drowsiness. This was optional, although the nurse (and anesthesiologist) highly recommended it. I knew that Garrett would have a meltdown having to be passed off to a stranger and carried away. The nurse working with us in pre-op had already failed several times at distraction attempts while putting his ankle band on, checking his temperature, listening to his heart and lungs, etc. My kid doesn't miss a thing. He's very curious and observant and no matter how well trained you are at your job, he's gonna see what you're trying to do, and he's gonna fight it if it doesn't feel or look normal. (No offence to her, she tried hard and did great.) She explained to us that when he arrived at the O.R. it would look and be very scary for him to see all the people in scrubs and masks. This medicine would help him relax and not care, and would make the putting him to sleep part less scary too. For some reason I thought I would be able to be with him until he was out, but that wasn't the case, so we took the medicine to avoid the trauma and permanent fear of doctors and hospitals.

Droopy Garrett was pretty cute. When it was time, the nurse came in. She told us how long he'd be and where we should wait. She had another nurse with her. The one that bugged me. She stood in the entry way of the room, leaning against the wall with her arms folded. When the nurse said she'd be the one I'd hand Garrett to, I expected her to come talk to us. She didn't move, or even look up at us. I wasn't excited about handing my son to her.They let me carry him out of the room to the double doors, and then I had to leave him. Whenever Garrett needs something and I'm busy I say, "just a minute" or "I'll be there in a minute". I guess I always put up one finger when I do it because now whenever I say anything close to that, he sticks up one finger, so I know he gets it. I kissed his cheek and told him I'd see him in a minute and he was fine. It's no fun watching your son be taken away through the skinny window on those doors.

We went to the waiting room, Paul ran downstairs to Starbucks, and it seemed in no time the doctor came out to tell us everything went great. The nurse called us to recovery, and we got back to him before he was awake. This was the hardest part for me. It would have been very easy to sit and cry, (even though he was done). No matter how short and simple a surgery is, it's still overwhelming to see your baby laying there asleep with tubes, wires, and an IV. It was also overwhelming to see all the other little kids in recovery. But I knew G could wake up at any time and I didn't want him to see me crying, I wanted to be his happy mom when he woke up. We were in pre-op with a little 4 year old who, based on bits of the parents conversation with the nurse, I could tell this was not his first surgery or first hospital stay. When his doc asked him if he knew what he was going to do today, the little boy said, "You're gonna send in a spaceship, and the spaceship is gonna shoot bombs at all the germs, and then when I wake up I'll be in the popsicle room." What brave little kids there are out there. In recovery we were right next to them and I asked how the spaceship did. His parents said "really well" and they asked how Garrett was. It makes me so thankful for my healthy kids, and hurt for ones that have a lot of challenging health problems.The nurse explained eating, giving pain meds, nap time, bath time, how to take off the bandage, etc. Then she showed us the goods. Right as she finished, he woke up. Not only did he wake up, he almost shot right out of the bed. Luckily the nurse was ready and was able to remove the mask, and control all the tubes and wires so that he could crawl right into my arms without any obstacles. He was so snugly, and didn't cry a bit, nor did he try and rip the IV needle out of his hand. Both of which surprised the nurse. The nurse gave him some apple juice. In the pictures it looks like he's asleep with the bottle in his mouth, but he was gulping that juice down. He's never drank so fast in his life. He finished and was sound asleep. We were in post-op for about a half an hour and then we headed home. He didn't wake up until 2 hours after we got home.We're 12 hours post-surgery as I'm typing this, and he's totally been his normal, goofy, happy, active self all day. 2 good naps, 2 doses of pain meds, 2 poops, 3 or 4 pees (that didn't seem to burn), a lot of fluids, and some dinner. That's about right. We're just hoping for a full nights sleep and a slow day at home tomorrow, that will include 4 soaks in the tub. That's the part I'm worried about. How do you make a 16 month old soak in a tub 4 times a day, for 15 minutes at a time, for a week, while you're also watching a 3 month old?? My mom is here til Wednesday morning...I'm hoping she'll stay an extra couple days just to be on bath duty.

So that's it. I'm proud of my brave little boy. And I bet he doesn't even remember it. Glad it's finally done!

Routine, etc...and being in the sun!

2012-02-04T21:47:00.001-07:00

I think Garrett was close to 6 months old before I felt like I knew how each day would go for the most part. Addison is 2 and a half months old and I can say that 75% of the time we have a routine for about 75% of the day. There's about 25% of each day that never goes how I think it will and there's 25% of the time that nothing goes how I think it will. But I still feel pretty good about it and feel like we're going in the right direction.

Because I'm feeling more organized and confident about what the kids need and when they need it, we've been able to add our late morning walk back to the day. Garrett and I did it most days, but it hasn't happened much since Addie came along. But we started back up last week and haven't missed a day. Our days go SO MUCH better when we have time outside. Garrett loves being outside and it takes a nice chunk of time and makes the day go faster and smoother. It's also awesome that we have a fun park a block away and Garrett would stay there for hours. I don't love going there with both kids because Garrett's not a great listener and he runs off a lot to places I can't get the stroller. But we've stopped a couple times. I'm looking forward to longer days so we can go on dinner picnics to the park so Paul can watch a kid while I watch the other. We've even had a few times where both kids napped at the exact same time! It's heaven...those little mommy victories...

Anyway, here's what we've been up to.We play a lot.
We celebrated Paul's aunt's birthday. She wanted In-n-out for dinner so I dressed the kids in their in-n-out onesies that they got for Christmas.
I try and take a picture of Addie if she's ever dressed in anything other than a sleeper because it doesn't happen much.Garrett hung out with his Grandma for a couple hours one afternoon and when I went to pick him up he'd helped pick these flowers for me from Poppy's garden.Garrett still drinks from a bottle. I really have no idea when 'they' say to stop that, but he doesn't seem interested in stopping anytime soon. (And I don't do much to get him to stop.) He can drink for a straw and a sippy cup, but as far as no spills and efficiency, the bottle works best for us. But he always wants a bottle hanging out of his mouth lately. Even if it's empty. He walks around and plays and keeps a bottle hanging there. Sometimes its full of juice and it takes him 3 hours to finish it. It's clearly become a comfort thing for him though, because its empty more often than not. I bought a pacifier a couple days ago for age 12-36 months. He's never taken one, and I wasn't thrilled about introducing him to one, but the empty bottle is driving me crazy. I gave it to him and he thought he was the coolest dude around for about 5 minutes. Then he pulled it out and went back to the bottle and hasn't sucked on the pacifier since. I know, take the bottle away...blah blah... Easier said than done.

**An update since I started writing this a couple days ago. Garrett had a check-up at the doctor, had 3 (tear free) shots, and the doc said its time to ditch the bottles. Lame.

Anyway, other fun stuff.

We went to Downtown Disney to have lunch with some friends from San Diego. I only have these pictures from before we left, none at lunch. It really is fun having a 'cool dude' and a 'pretty lady' to get all dressed up to go out.I gave cake pops another shot. I hate the cake pops that you mash up the cake and mix with frosting. They don't taste bad, it's the making them part that grosses me out. I feel like I'm dipping handled play dough in chocolate and serving it. But I think they're cute. I found this cake pop pan and it's actual non-mashed cake under that chocolate. They were so easy and fun to make, and yummy.I made the cake pops for a family get together. Paul's cousin was in town from Scotland and we had dinner. I of course only took pictures of the kids. Garrett's second cousin taught him all about dolls, (bottom left) and for about the millionth time, she told me, "Cousin Garrett is so cute! He's almost as cute as my cousin Jonathan." Someday I'm hoping Garrett will win the cute contest against whoever this Jonathan kid is. ;) And another second cousin (top left), after he spent a lot of time examining Addie and holding her hand, said, "Hmm, maybe I'll marry cousin Addie..."We spent a day last weekend at Huntington Beach. It was a beautiful day. We took our new wagon and it was great.We had lunch at Ruby's on the Pier. How cute are these faces? I love these kids. In the black and white picture of Garrett he was mad that he couldn't have diet coke and mustard. He had to settle for limes and pickles...He loves those things. Funny kid.We took a long walk and we played in the sand. Garrett was so fun at the beach. He loves sand. The first time we took him it scared him, but now we can't drag him away. Sand was in every pocket, every cuff, in his ears, eyes, hair, and diaper. And he enjoyed every second of it.We're having a pretty good winter.

I'm never buying hand sanitizer again. Ever.

2012-02-02T09:30:00.000-07:00

Ok, that's probably not true, but I wanted to make a dramatic entrance.

When we went to Utah for Christmas, my dad had a cold, and Paul had just gotten over a cold. By the end of the trip my dad, mom, Paul, Laura, me, and Garrett all had colds. When the four of us got home we did a good job at keeping it away from Addie, but we did a bad job at getting over it.

When we were all finally healthy I became slightly obsessed with keeping everything and everyone clean of germs. I've tried to limit Garrett's time in public and if I do take him places, I wipe down the entire shopping cart, and I don't let him touch things, etc. If we play at the park, I practically follow him around with wipes. And when we've gotten together with people I ask ahead of time if everyone we're going with is healthy. I did a really good job and keeping my kids healthy.

Why my sudden obsession with germs?

Garrett is scheduled for surgery this Monday, the 6th. If we still lived in Utah he would have had it last March. But because we moved we had to find a new ped, get another referral, have another consultation, and schedule the surgery here. Just to get a consultation they were 4 and a half months out, and even though I told them we had a consultation in Utah, we know what he needs, we have paper work, can't we schedule the surgery now while we're at it? The response was no, the doc had to see us in order to have us pay $40 (again) and say, yep, the Utah doctor is right, (who the doc here happens to be friends with) he needs surgery. Then the surgery schedule was booked out another 4 months. So I started this process in California last February and the earliest they could get us in for surgery was November. Right when Addie was due...and then the holidays, visitors, traveling, etc. So we scheduled it for February. The nurse told us that we needed to be careful because it was right in the middle of cold and flu season and in order to have the surgery he needed to be "completely healthy". I did a damn good job all of January doing just that, keeping him, and all of us healthy. Then yesterday morning at 3AM I heard coughing. I prayed it was just a little tickle in his throat. Then at about 6AM I heard coughing and sneezing. When I went to get him out of bed, his face was covered in snot, and he was rubbing his swollen eyes. I hoped it was just some sudden allergic reaction to the laundry soap, or the fish tank...or something!...and that as soon as we walked out of his room he'd be fine.

I spent all day yesterday wiping buckets and buckets of snot from his nose. Things just kept getting worse.

To say I'm pissed off is beyond an understatement. I know it shouldn't get to me like this, but it's been lingering over us for nearly a year and a half and I just want it done!

I told my massage lady last night that it was one of the worst days of my life. (continuing with my dramatic theme) I think I even punched my steering wheel on the way home. I felt sad for my little G man. I even started being hard on myself, blaming me for his cold because I wasn't able to nurse him for a year. I know a lot of sick breastfed babies and a lot of healthy formula fed babies, but whatever. I even cried a little bit while I was brushing my teeth last night.

So unless a freaking miracle happens in the next 24 hours, I have to call the hospital and reschedule this blasted surgery.

But I hope you all are having a fantastic day.

Oh, and did I mention that my parents are flying in tomorrow morning to watch Addie while we're at the hospital and help around the house for a few days? Yeah, they are.

sleep, spoons, to-dos, naps, crafts,

2012-01-24T12:57:00.001-07:00

1. I remember at church when Garrett was about a month old, saying to the mother of a one year old, "I'm just really looking forward to a full night's sleep again." She said, "I haven't had that in a year." Her mom, who was standing with us, said, "I haven't had that in almost 30 years." I guess that's something that is part of the mom deal. But I can't complain really. Addie has officially moved to her crib, and she's been sleeping great, makes me wish I'd done it a month ago. We've had about a week of 10:30PM-6:00AM. I just need to go to sleep at night when she does and I would be even better.

2. When I was in Utah my mom and I were cooking. She was using her go-to favorite wooden spoon (its actually bamboo) that she's had for a hundred years and she mentioned how much she loves it. I have the same one(s), it came in a set of 3, and they're the only ones I use. We bought them at the same time at a Pampered Chef party, not a hundred years ago, but probably 15. It's one of those kitchen items that if it broke, and I found out they were discontinued, I'd be sad. Makes me feel like I should order a few for each of us just to be safe. ...I just checked and they're still available. Phew. I find that I think this (stock up) way a lot. I'm kind of a hoarder.

3. We had visitors here a week ago, and we have more coming in a week. I love visitors for two reasons. One, I love visitors. Two, I get more stuff done around the house before they come. I always make a 'Before ________ Comes" list. And I do stuff like, organize my shoe racks, go through Garrett's closet, reorganize the diaper bags... It's usually stuff the visitors will never see or care about, but for some reason visitors get me to do the stuff that is otherwise hard to get to and always bumped to the bottom of the list.

4. Addie is finally learning to nap...knock on wood... She's been kind of a 20 or 30 minutes, here and there kind of napper. But the past few days she's done much better. I hope in continues. Garrett still takes 2 naps a day...knock on wood again... A 2 hour nap before lunch and a 1-2 hour nap after lunch and playtime. He's sleeping 10-11 hours at night too.

5. I want more craft time. I miss it. I guess if I have time to tell you what's going on on The Office, The Bachelor, Parenthood, Ellen, New Girl, and Glee, then I have time to craft. But I want uninterrupted, no-toddler-grabbing-everything-eating-glue-and-paper, craft time. Someday maybe... And since I'm wishing, I'd like a local Wood Connection, a closer Hobby Lobby, a big scrapbook store, and cheaper cricut cartridges.

And that's what's going on right now.

My "friend's" little boy...

2012-01-21T15:55:00.002-07:00

First some blog business. Addison has a blog. I started it in the summer and never mentioned it, then when she was born I thought about telling you, but I forgot. Then I thought maybe I won't because I think only family reads Garrett's anyway and lets be honest, it's not super interesting and its mostly just for me. But I decided I'd tell you in case anyone would like to keep up on more of the details of the kids and not just the stuff I put on my blog. Having said that, both of the kids blogs will be going private (to 'invited' readers only) at the end of the month. If you care to keep up with them, I'd be happy to invite you to read them. Leave a comment on this post (I wont publish it) with your email address and I'll send you an invite before the end of the month. If I don't know you, don't be scared to request an invite, just maybe tell me who you are, ie. friend of a friend, cousin of a friend, mom of a cousin of a friend, etc. Ok, that's all. I'll remind you a time or two before they go private. Garrett's blog is littlebabypaw.blogspot.com Addie's blog in littlebabypaw2.blogspot.com

***********************************

Now to my "friends" little boy. The blogging world seems so small to me. And I love it. I also love facebook usually. I hate talking on the phone and I never have time to. So FB and blogs remind me that I have friends. I love that we can have a couple over for dinner and I can say to the wife, "how did your job interview go today?" Even though I haven't spoken to her in 3 weeks, but I saw on FB earlier, "Wish me luck, I'm on my way to a job interview!" I love that I know that my friends son comes home from his mission in two weeks even though I haven't talked to my friend since before her son left on his mission (over two years). I love that I can call Melanie and ask her about croup, because I remember her blogging about her son having it a few months ago, even though Melanie and I really only talk when we have something to discuss about the kids. I love that I know Sarah is pregnant, Kelsey got married, Heather got a new job, it's not snowing in Utah, Sephra is on an anniversary trip, Elizabeth's and Kilene's babies are almost due, Aron passed his CFP test, Angela had a baby, Baby J is home from the hospital, baby Kate had a great 1st birthday with a cake that took 3 days to make, Morgan has to put her dog to sleep today, chick-fil-a is having a free entree rainy day special, etc. etc.

From time to time I wish I talked on the phone more and kept up with people better, and maybe I would if it wasn't for the internet. But I'm old enough to remember life without the internet and I think we're much better off with it than without it.

Moving on... I put "friend" in quotations because the friend I'm talking about? I've never met. Another reason blogs make the world feel smaller, and make me feel like we're all somehow connected. I often find myself saying things like, "My friend is finally pregnant and she's been trying for 3 years!" Or, "Oh you're from Chicago? I have friend in Chicago." Or, "My friends little girl has to be in the hospital over Christmas." And really, all these "friends" are people I don't know in 'real life'. They're fellow bloggers. People I've found over the years through friends, or friends of friends, or cousins of friends sister-in-laws brothers wifes moms friend. (Do you see now why I'm fine if you read my blog, and you want to read my kids blogs?) I've read so many blogs that have helped me get through a rough day, or a rough bout with depression, or the struggles of living far from my family, or a stupid fight. Mostly because I've found people I can relate to, and it makes me feel better to know there are people going through what I'm going through. It makes me feel less alone. I also love reading about fun trips, cute things kids say, funny things that happened that day, new traditions I want to start, cute crafty ideas, and that I'm not the only mother of a child who has licked a toilet bowl cleaner. We're all just trying to do the best we can, and blogs help me see that, and remind me of that when I'm having an off day.

So finally, the actual reason I'm writing this. The friend I'm writing about is actually my cousin's wife's friend's friend, and I've read her blog for a while. Her little 4 year old boy, Atticus, was diagnosed last friday with a brain stem tumor. This next bit is from Atticus' mom:

"Atticus has a Diffuse Intrinsic Pontine Glioma (DIPG). Its a tumor located in the pons (middle) of the brain stem. The brain stem is the bottom most portion of the brain, connecting the cerebrum with the spinal cord. The majority of brain stem tumors occur in the pons (middle brain stem) and are diffusely infiltrating, (they grow amidst the nerves), and therefore are not able to be surgically removed.

The median overall survival of children diagnosed with DIPG is approximately 9 months. The 1 and 2 year survival rates are approximately 30% and less than 10%, respectively. These statistics make it one of the most devastating pediatric malignancies.

The standard treatment for DIPG is 6 weeks of radiation which often dramatically improves symptoms. Unfortunately, problems usually recur after 6 to 9 months, and progress rapidly. (Source: St Jude Childrens Research Hospital)."

I can't even imagine getting news like this. My heart aches for this family. I've cried several times this past week just thinking about them, usually when I'm holding Addie or playing with or reading to Garrett. I'm overwhelmed with how blessed I feel. I've become more patient this week with my impatient, attention demanding son, and my daughter who won't nap. The parents of Atticus are amazing. They are being so strong for their little boy even though they're dying inside.

So, if you're the praying type, please send one up for little Atticus. His mom is requesting specifically for prayers that his symptoms will decrease fast. Atticus has lost sight in his right eye and he can't balance anymore. He's a little athlete and his parents want him to be able to kick a soccer ball, run, and play sports again.

If you'd like to read the rest of their story and follow little Atticus' progress, you can find their blog HERE.

Visitors!

2012-01-19T11:08:00.000-07:00

Some of our best friends, Mara and Aron came to town this past weekend. They were here for their one year anniversary and we were so honored that they wanted to spend it with us. We had so much fun again this trip (they came last April, too).

They got to town Friday afternoon. That evening my in-laws watched the kids and the four of us went to a fun restaurant on the beach in Huntington. It was so yummy and so fun. Paul and I only try out new places when visitors come to town. We need more visitors because there are a lot of super fun local places here. We put the kids to bed as soon as we got home and the 4 of us played games until the wee hours of the morning. (I remember feeling at the end of their trip that I was really tired. I blamed it on Addie, but the truth is that she slept great while they were here, but us adults never went to bed!)

Saturday we spent the day at the Santa Monica pier. I'd never been there either and it was really pretty. Perfect weather. Good company. Beautiful views. The ocean. It was a really nice day. Saturday night we went to dinner at a Mexican restaurant and then played more games.

Sunday was their actual anniversary, and what better way to spend it than being apart from each other, (haha). We dropped the kiddos off again and Paul and Aron went golfing for the day, and Mara and I went for pedicures and did some shopping at the Citadel outlets. Sunday night the guys barbecued for us, and of course we played more games all night.

Monday we had a skype quadruple date with the Mchenrys and the Elberts back in Utah. We planned our 2nd annual friends trip for June. So excited already! We're (kind of) keeping it close this year mainly because between the 4 couples there are 4 kids, all under two. We're going to bear lake for a few days. Can't wait.

Paul found a place to grab lunch on our way to LAX, and way too quickly, the trip was over.

We love the Riddles, and we say all the time that we're so glad they still like to hang out with us, even with all the spit-up, sticky fingers, tears, and stinky diapers.

Aron found this knife in the "guys locker room" (Paul's bathroom) and came out wearing it one morning.That's a real bird.This guy handed it to G in Santa Monica.The Santa Monica pier in the back ground.A new outfit from Auntie Mara and Uncle Aron.This isn't G's first time in the sand, but it's the first time he loved it instead of being scared of it.Go Aron!Garrett discovered something new while riding in the car. Silly kid.In case anyone is wondering, we love having friends and family come to visit. Hint, hint...

Kiss Cancer Good-bye!

2012-01-18T15:17:00.000-07:00

Both of my kids, (and me) spend a lot of time in our pajamas these days, so when I dress them, I usually try and take a picture of it for proof.Paul's best friend Nate, (we call him Sode) was diagnosed with Cancer last year and spent most of his summer doing chemo. It was a long and hard year for them. He recently got the wonderful news that he's now cancer free! His wife, Heidi, planned a surprise 'Kiss Cancer Good-bye' party for him.

We don't get to see them often so it was great to be with them and their families, and a few other friends.We're so happy for Sode.

Surprise!

2012-01-12T12:41:00.000-07:00

This past Monday morning everyone was off. Garrett work up an hour early. Addie woke up twice during the time she's usually sleeping great. So of course I woke up early, but tried to not fully open my eyes and accept the fact that sleepy time was over. Paul left at 6:45 because he said he had to meet with a family in Long Beach early and traffic would be bad. I tried to get both kids to go back to sleep and nothing was working. I sat on my bed nursing Addie, thinking to myself, I want to call in sick today. I also thought, if my mom lived close today would be one of those days I'd ask her to come and just hang out all day and help me. Paul came back from his "appointment" and came to our room and told me he brought me starbucks if I wanted to come out and join him before he had to go down to work. So I did. I was complaining about the morning, and I turned to walk in the living room and my brother Scott, sister in law Laura, and my mom were sitting there. I just stood there, shocked, and didn't say anything for a minute. How is this possible?!?

Laura's mom works for Jetblue and she gave them buddy passes. Laura planned it all with Paul. My mom didn't find out till the night before. It was so awesome! It totally turned my day around. We spent the day talking, shopping, going to lunch, going on a walk, and playing at the park, we also went to Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, Twice! Laura introduced us to the ice blended pure chocolate. So yummy. They flew home at 8 o'clock that night. The day went fast, but it was such a fun surprise. My sister in law is so awesome and thoughtful.

The gross one about Garrett's bum.

2012-01-11T09:14:00.001-07:00

A few months ago I self-diagnosed Garrett with chronic constipation. This past Saturday, I FINALLY got a doctor to agree with me. For months now we've been told to try this, and try that, and check back in a month. Nothing worked. Nothing. Here's just a few things we've tried. Prune juice, prunes, apple juice, white grape juice, tummy massage, pear juice, warm baths, super fiber foods, fruits, vegis, Karo syrup, exercise, almond milk, soy milk, goats milk, toddler formula, soy formula... I could go on and on...

He has pellet poops and most of the time it looks painful to get out. Twice in the past 3 weeks poor Garrett had two poops that made him shake and brought him to tears. The second time it happened I was so done. We were going to the doctor that minute and I was staying until I left with something I knew would help. Conveniently enough, it happened to be on a Saturday and Paul was working. So, I called the doc, loaded both kids in the car, and headed to the clinic, 20 minutes before they closed.

We were sitting in the waiting room and he pooped again. Another bad, painful one. I didn't have the diaper bag, but fortunately they had a diaper I could have. I wanted to show the pediatrician the poop, but she said my description was enough. Whatever. Who doesn't want to look at poop?

This doctor, that we'd never met before, asked the most questions, and seemed the most interested in helping me. Or maybe she knew that I knew it was closing time, and that I was there until I was ready to leave, so she had better come up with something good.

We were about to leave with a pro biotic/miralax/apple juice combo plan, and the doc decided last minute to do a swab in his bum and hurry and test it. Garrett started laughing when he was being swabbed, which made me laugh, because ya know, I'm 12.

She tested it, and turns out Garrett has yet again something I've never heard of. Butt Strep. There's a medical term for it, but when the doc said it, I said, "What?" And she said, "you know, like Strep Throat? It's like that, but in his butt." What the ouch! She said he probably has a lot of fear associated with pooping because this infection is so painful. Poor little guy. So we immediately started a 10 day antibiotic (which has loosened him right up.) Then we'll see if the constipation returns and if it does we'll go on with the original plan.

Just another day in our crazy lives. And now you know what to try and check for if you ever find yourself in a similar situation. You're welcome.

I'll be glad I parented.

2012-01-10T09:13:00.003-07:00

I came across a great post early yesterday morning that I really needed at the time that I read it. I could have written it myself because it's something that I believe all moms go through at some point (or probably at most points) in raising small children. I'll link you to it at the end. It's a must read, especially if you're a mom of young kids.

I've been feeling a little off lately. And I think I figured out part of my problem. Here are just a few things that have been said to me when I've been out and about this past week with one or both of my kids.

"Oh, she's beautiful. Enjoy every second you have with her."

"Enjoy this time. They'll be gone before you know it."

"Wow, she's so little...I have 6 and they're all gone now..."

"Enjoy every minute with them. It goes by so fast."

"Ohh...wow...my youngest is 17 now, so..."

"Enjoy every minute. It'll be over before you know it."

"The next thing you know, you'll be a grandma, so enjoy every minute you have with your kids."

I almost always respond with a smile. Sometimes a, "yes, that's what I hear." Sometimes a, yes, it's going quickly."

And then I get home and question everything I do. Why don't I enjoy cleaning Addie's poo off my hand?? Why don't I enjoy that Garrett shakes his head 'no' to everything I ask?? Why don't I enjoy hearing one of the kids cry when I finally think I have 5 seconds to just sit and stare at the wall?? Why don't I enjoy going to a party and looking at my shirt to see that I have spit up on one boob, and Garrett makes me drop spaghetti on the other boob?? Why don't I enjoy that at the same party during the toasts, Paul and I both have to leave the room, each with a screaming child?? Why don't I enjoy picking mac and cheese up off the carpet?? Why don't I enjoy Garrett hitting Addie in the head with a race car right after I get her to sleep?? Why don't I enjoy Addie pooping seconds after I change her diaper?? Why don't I enjoy that before the pediatrician could check Garrett's temperature, she first had to pull a chunk of toaster strudel out of his ear?? Why don't I enjoy kids pooping in the bathtub?? What's wrong with me?? Why did God allow me to be a mom?? I'm bad at it!! I don't enjoy it!!

And then I find myself hoping that the next time an old grandma tells me at the grocery store to "enjoy. every. second." that Addie will projectile spit up all over her face, so I can say, "How's that? Are you remembering now how much you enjoyed every second of raising children??"

In this post, the blogger quoted a famous writer, who, when asked if he loves writing, says, "No. But I love having written."

Being a parent is hard work. Really hard work. Just about everyday has had something (or a lot of somethings) that are tough and that I don't enjoy. But at the end of the day when I finally get to fall asleep, even if only for a little while, I find myself saying something really cliche to Paul like,"Can you believe we get to keep them?" or, "I can't believe how much I love them." I'm confident that one day, when my kids are grown and gone, and I'm that old grandma at the grocery store, I'll be able to say, "I love that I parented."

Read THIS. I'm copying and pasting it below as well, so that one day when I have time to order blog books to keep as journals, I can look back and read it again.

"Every time I’m out with my kids – this seems to happen:

An older woman stops us, puts her hand over her heart and says something like, “Oh- Enjoy every moment. This time goes by so fast.”

Everywhere I go, someone is telling me to seize the moment, raise my awareness, be happy, enjoy every second, etc, etc, etc.

I know that this message is right and good. But as 2011 closes, I have finally allowed myself to admit that it just doesn’t work for me. It bugs me. This CARPE DIEM message makes me paranoid and panicky. Especially during this phase of my life – while I’m raising young kids. Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I’m not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I’m doing something wrong.

I think parenting young children (and old ones, I’ve heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they’ve heard there’s magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it’s hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.

And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers – “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU’LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN’T!” TRUST US!! IT’LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!” - those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.

Now. I’m not suggesting that the sweet old ladies who tell me to ENJOY MYSELF be thrown from a mountain. These are wonderful ladies. Monkees, probably. But last week, a woman approached me in the Target line and said the following: “Sugar, I hope you are enjoying this. I loved every single second of parenting my two girls. Every single moment. These days go by so fast.”

At that particular moment, Amma had arranged one of the new bras I was buying on top of her sweater and was sucking a lollipop that she must have found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feather stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras. I couldn’t find Chase anywhere, and Tish was grabbing the pen on the credit card swiper thing WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, “Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you.”

That’s not exactly what I wanted to say, though.

There was a famous writer who, when asked if he loved writing, replied, “No. but I love having written.” What I wanted to say to this sweet woman was, “Are you sure? Are you sure you don’t mean you love having parented?”

I love having written. And I love having parented. My favorite part of each day is when the kids are put to sleep (to bed) and Craig and I sink into the couch to watch some quality TV, like Celebrity Wife Swap, and congratulate each other on a job well done. Or a job done, at least.

Every time I write a post like this, I get emails suggesting that I’m being negative. I have received this particular message four or five times – G, if you can’t handle the three you have, why do you want a fourth?

That one always stings, and I don’t think it’s quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it’s hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she’s not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn’t add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it’s so hard means she IS doing it right…in her own way…and she happens to be honest.

Craig is a software salesman. It’s a hard job in this economy. And he comes home each day and talks a little bit about how hard it is. And I don’t ever feel the need to suggest that he’s not doing it right, or that he’s negative for noticing that it’s hard, or that maybe he shouldn’t even consider taking on more responsibility. And I doubt anybody comes by his office to make sure he’s ENJOYING HIMSELF. I doubt his boss peeks in his office and says: “This career stuff…it goes by so fast…ARE YOU ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT IN THERE, CRAIG???? CARPE DIEM, CRAIG!”

My point is this. I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn’t enjoying it enough. Double failure. I felt guilty because I wasn’t in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn’t MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I’d wake up and the kids would be gone, and I’d be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.

But the fact remains that I will be that nostalgic lady. I just hope to be one with a clear memory. And here’s what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line:

“It’s helluva hard, isn’t it? You’re a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She’s my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime.” And hopefully, every once in a while, I’ll add- “Let me pick up that grocery bill for ya, sister. Go put those kids in the van and pull on up- I’ll have them bring your groceries out.”

Anyway. Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn’t work for me. I can’t even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.

Here’s what does work for me:

There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It’s regular time, it’s one minute at a time, it’s staring down the clock till bedtime time, it’s ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it’s four screaming minutes in time out time, it’s two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.

Then there’s Kairos time. Kairos is God’s time. It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. It’s those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.

Like when I actually stop what I’m doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is. I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can’t hear her because all I can think is – This is the first time I’ve really seen Tish all day, and my God – she is so beautiful. Kairos.

Like when I’m stuck in chronos time in the grocery line and I’m haggard and annoyed and angry at the slow check-out clerk. And then I look at my cart and I’m transported out of chronos. And suddenly I notice the piles and piles of healthy food I’ll feed my children to grow their bodies and minds and I remember that most of the world’s mamas would kill for this opportunity. This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay. And I just stare at my cart. At the abundance. The bounty. Thank you, God. Kairos.

Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with Theo asleep at my feet and Craig asleep by my side and I listen to them both breathing. And for a moment, I think- how did a girl like me get so lucky? To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth? Kairos.

These kairos moments leave as fast as they come- but I mark them. I say the word kairos in my head each time I leave chronos. And at the end of the day, I don’t remember exactly what my kairos moments were, but I remember I had them. And that makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.

If I had a couple Kairos moments during the day, I call it a success.

Carpe a couple of Kairoses a day.

Good enough for me."

(from: http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/)

our little white christmas

2012-01-05T09:19:00.000-07:00

In all the scheduling and trip planning, we forgot to decide when the four of us would do our Christmas. So we did it when we got back from Utah. It was mostly for Garrett because Paul gave me my gifts in Utah and he knew what he was getting. He got a smoker. I gave him one for his birthday but it wasn't a good one, so we returned it. The new one was a lot more money so it had to count for his birthday and Christmas, but he was happy. Garrett's favorite gifts were a xylophone and a marble works castle. I did a collage of him with his xylophone because I love all his faces. The marble works castle was a big hit too. But the big marbles have bells in them. It's already driving me crazy. The makers of loud toys must not have kids. Next year we're having a quiet toy Christmas!And Addie obviously didn't care about any of it.This is my 'while visions of sugarplums danced in her head' picture.We really enjoyed Christmas, and we hope you all had a wonderful holiday as well.

The rest of the Utah trip.

2012-01-04T13:10:00.000-07:00

We had lunch with Grandma and Grandpa Garrett, and then an evening at Temple Square. Grammy chased Garrett around the visitors center for about a half hour while Paul talked to the missionaries.Four Generations.Paul took me to lunch at my favorite Indian restaurant, Curry in a Hurry. Then we went to Nailed, and both got pedicures. That night we went to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. I had no idea they were coming to SLC after Christmas this year. It worked perfectly and it was a total surprise. It was the highlight of my trip!There was so much that I didn't take pictures of. I'm getting really bad about that. Lunch with friends...a couple visits to the wood connection...lunch with Paul's old work friends...We got to see the Mchenrys.Addie made it till mid-night on new years eve. (Garrett missed it by about 4 hours.) She had a two hour nap just before mid-night, but it sounds like Dick Clark did too, so it still counts.We were supposed to head home on new years day, but a couple days before, my mom got a call from my aunt about a shower for my cousin. His wife is having twins and there was a shower planned for new years day. There was a bit of a miscommunication, and person A thought person B was doing food, and person B thought person A was doing food and person C was doing decor and games, and person C didn't know they were supposed to be involved at all. My aunt called in a panic to see if I could give her some ideas... Long story short, we extended our trip an extra day and I did food for 40 people, games, decor, and favors for the shower.I guess Garrett wanted to stay with Grammy...We're home now and doing alright. Paul has been sick for 2 and a half weeks and Garrett and I both got colds in Utah. So this week we're just trying to rest a lot and keep Addie healthy.

2012 predictions, 2011 re-cap

2012-01-03T22:04:00.000-07:00

Here's my 2011 predictions and what actually happened. As well as my 2012 predictions.

January: Paul heads to California. Mara and Aron get married and become The Riddles!!! Garrett and I join Paul in California.

I was right. Paul headed to CA. (Stay tuned for my 1 yr Californiaversary post coming soon.) Mara and Aron got married. Garrett and I headed to CA. My mom came with us and stayed a week to help me paint/unpack.

February: I feel settled into our new place. Garrett and I spend a lot of time exploring our new town. The Elberts visit us.

I was kind of right. It took me a long time to feel settled. Garrett and I did some exploring. The Elberts came to CA for my birthday weekend and we had a great time. My parents also came to CA for the weekend of Valentines to surprise me. It was awesome.

March: We buy a new bedroom set, king size. We visit Utah to see family, friends, and meet the new Baby Mchenry!!!

I was right. We got a king size bed in Utah. So we got to see lots of family and friends and baby Mchenry. I also found out I was pregnant the day before an appointment where I was going to get on birth control. And Scott and Laura came to CA to see us.

April: We have some newlyweds from Tahoe visit us. Please??? My mom and aunts come visit.

I was right. The Riddles came to visit from Tahoe. So fun. My mom and her 3 sisters came too. Garrett and I went on a surprise trip to Utah thanks to my sis-in-laws buddy pass.

May: Paul and I have a "Budget Summit" so we can stay on track to get out of debt fast, but still have a fun summer.

I was wrong. There was no budget summit. I just trust Paul with our money. We went to Wyoming to scatter Paul's Grandmas remains. We went to Utah for my grandma and grandpa's 70th wedding anniversary party, which I just realized I never posted about! I'll do it soon. We learned that Garrett needed a reshaping helmet.

June: We celebrate 2 years of marriage. We'll say we should go somewhere, but we won't because we'll be saving and planning for July and August.

I was mostly wrong. We went to Vegas for a week with my family. We celebrated our anniversary at a really nice restaurant called Summit House. The next week we went to Santa Barbara, Paul took me on a train and we stayed in a cute little bed and breakfast. Garrett got his doc band. I had a root canal. I was never so happy to see a dentist. Found out we were having a girl.

July: We take Garrett and go visit Uncle Taylor in Alaska.

I was wrong. We ran out of travel money after we payed for the doc band. We went on our first annual friends trip to Lake Tahoe. I peed my pants and spent a few hours in the hospital because I thought my water broke. Garrett started physical therapy twice a week.

August: We have the first annual vacation with our "usual" group of friends in Tahoe. We plan annual trip #2.

I was wrong. I got a lot done to be ready for 2.0 to get here. I worked on a lot of details for Garrett's first birthday party. And the 2nd annual trip STILL isn't planned.

September: Garrett turns 1!!! I go overboard and throw a fantastic party. Paul and I talk about plans to add a sibling for Garrett. Who knows what life will really be like with a 1 year old and probably still adjusting to California. But I'm guessing I'll be ready to have that conversation when Garrett is 1.

I was mostly right. We went to Utah to meet baby Elbert, but she wasn't born until we were gone. Garrett's birthday and party was awesome. I'm sure Paul and I talked about Garrett's sibling, but it wasn't so much about when it would happen, but more, "Holy crap. It's happening in 6 weeks." Garrett and I headed to Utah an the end of September for my brothers wedding.

October: We buy some furniture. Living room set, dining room set maybe. Either Paul's sister or one of my 2 single brothers get married. None of them are dating anyone right now, I just have a feeling.

I was mostly right. We bought furniture but it was for the new nursery. My brother Taylor got married!!! Paul was only in Utah for one day and Garrett and I were there for 2 weeks. It was a little much at 8 months pregnant. But it was so nice to have Grammy's help so I could rest. Paul traded my Jetta in for a mini van. I finally felt (mostly) settled in California.

November: We visit Utah for Thanksgiving. We get rid of the Jetta and buy a truck. I have a huge birthday party for Paul on 11/11/11. It will start at 7:11 and end at 11:11. And we'll serve slurpees.

I was wrong. My mom came to town. There was no party for Paul. I took him to dinner and then I got a massage, (I know, I'm so thoughtful.) We were just waiting around for the baby to get here. Addison was born on Nov. 15th. My dad and Dave came out for Thanksgiving. (my mom was already here.)

December: We have a much calmer December. We start new traditions and make memories as Garrett begins to understand the excitement and magic of the season.

I was wrong. December was anything but calm. The transition to life with 2 was busy but easier than I expected. My mom came to town for a couple days and flew home with Garrett. Paul, Addie and I drove out a couple days later to spend Christmas and New Years in Utah, and all of us got sick except Addie. Thanks, Utah.

Here are my 2012 predictions.

January: The Riddles come visit for their 1st wedding anniversary. I do spring cleaning early...I have a couple big organizing projects I'm itching to get done... We finally plan trip #2.

February: Taylor and Samira come to visit from Alaska. My mom and dad come to visit. Garrett has surgery.

March: The Elbert's come to visit. We sell our Explorer.

April: I win the lottery.

May: We hopefully go to Utah for the 2012 Cystic Fibrosis Great Strides Walk to support our friends and (Garrett's buddy) their little boy.

June: We go on our 2nd annual friends trip. We celebrate anniversary #3.

July: We go on a White family vacation. Addison learns to crawl. I introduce Garrett to the idea of peeing in the toilet. (I'm not looking forward to this chapter of life.)

August: I help my mom redo a couple rooms in her house. We go on a Greenhalgh vacation.

September: Scott and Laura announce that they are having a baby.

October: I start to feel like we're outgrowing our apartment with 2 mobile children, and we think about moving.

November: Addie turns one. I try and pull off a California party and a Utah party. We spent Thanksgiving in Utah. Taylor and Samira have a baby.

December: We spend Christmas in California. Paul's sister or my brother get engaged.

(4)Christmas(es)

2011-12-28T15:04:00.000-07:00

Holidays are complicated with more than one family. You’d think it would simplify when the two families are in different states and you alternate years, but this year it seemed to make things more busy and last a lot longer. I guess its all the packing for vacation, loading, and organizing of gifts. We’ve had 4 Christmases so far, and our presents just for the four of us are still wrapped under the tree back in California. We’re in Utah and have been since Christmas Eve morning. My mom was in California for a few days and she took Garrett home with her. They flew home a couple days before Paul, Addie and I drove out. We left the evening of the 23^rd, and we drove through the night. Paul took the first half and I took over at 11:30PM I didn’t sleep at all while he was driving but I did fine. We got to Bountiful at 4:30AM. Addie did awesome. We only got her out of her car seat once for a diaper change. She was awake some, slept a lot, and didn’t cry once the whole 11 hours. I hope she does as well on the drive home, but I’m not counting on it because Garrett will be with us.

#1. The weekend before Christmas we celebrated with the Whites. We had dinner and opened gifts. I won’t even try and remember all that our (spoiled) kids got at the 4 Christmases, but I went shopping yesterday for a storage bin, and a new cube shelf with canvas totes because I know it’ll take some organizing when we get home. I’m also planning on packing away a few unopened toys that I might re-gift to Garrett on his birthday next year when they are more age appropriate. He’ll never know! I got that cool red canvas wagon for the park and the beach. It’ll carry food, drinks, towels, toys, and babies. I love it. And Paul became and NFL owner. His dad bought him stock in the Greenbay Packers. He is beyond thrilled. (click on collages to make them bigger.)

#2. On Christmas Eve we had a turkey dinner with my family and my Aunt Barbara and Grandma and Grandpa Garrett. Then we did the nativity. It was a little rough this year. Garrett the shepherd was all over the place and baby Jesus (Addie) had the hiccups the whole time. But we made it through. Then we did aunt/uncle/great grandparent gifts. (And about the turkey dinner, I’d love to know if people think that the traditional Thanksgiving dinner should also be the traditional Christmas Eve or Christmas Day dinner. I kind of had to talk my mom into this meal, and I seem to be the only one who really thinks it should be the same.) Anyway, it was a yummy dinner, fun gifts, and good company.

#3. Christmas morning we did gifts with my parents and stockings for each other and went to church. Garrett did great at opening gifts, even though it took him a while. And Addie was all smiles, all day. She’s ‘real’ smiling now, and it’s so fun. Paul went slightly over budget. He does every year. I got a cute cover for my iphone, among other things, and he also made me a Bedtime Caddy out of a tote with a handle. I never make it to bed without several trips to the living room, so the tote is to help me remember vitamins, phone, monitors, chargers, burp clothes, and anything else I may need. He’s so thoughtful. But the best gift, I get today. We went to lunch and got pedicures, and I got tickets to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra tonight at the Energy Solutions Arena!!! I’m so excited!!! If you’ve never seen TSO live, you need to at least once. This is my 4^th year seeing them and it never gets old. Someone asked me once if TSO is kind of like ‘The Forgotten Carols.’ Umm, no. Not even close. (There’s a reason those carols are forgotten.)

#4. Christmas afternoon was spent with my family and my Auntie and Uncle Jon. Yummy food, yummy pie, and some gifts. I love Christmas at Auntie’s. It’s a great way to spend the afternoon. Garrett loved exploring and playing. After his birthday he started understanding the concept of blowing out candles. But now he tries to blow out everything- flashlights, LED candles, and Christmas lights. The picture on the top right is him trying to blow out the Christmas tree. Both the kids zonked out as soon as we got in the car. It was a fun full day.

On Christmas night Paul and I went out to do our Christmas night tradition. Late dinner at Denny’s and a big tip for the server. This is 3 years in a row now and we love doing it. On the drive there and back we talked about what we hope to be able to do to help people more in the future, and how excited we are to get our kids involved in the tradition, and also how we want to think of new ways of gift giving primarily with our siblings. We’re all the type that if we want something we just go buy it, so there’s nothing any of us ever really need come Christmas. We’re working on some ideas to help others rather that giving unnecessary stuff to each other every year.

Anyway, we had fun. And I'm looking forward to the coming years as the kids get older and more excited about Christmas.

Cute Naked Babies

2011-12-23T10:03:00.000-07:00

Paul asked me a couple days ago if I had any bath time pictures of Addie. I couldn't remember. But my thought was, compared to Garrett as a newborn, I don't really have ANY pictures of Addie. I didn't believe it when moms said you photograph #2 less. But it's oh so true. Too true. So here's Addie in the bath.And here's her older brother running around naked. And if you're wondering if he walked right over to my Christmas tress and stood there and peed all over them, the answer is yes.Speaking of Garrett running around. Both of my kids have exciting news this week! I mentioned that Garrett stopped even trying to walk once Addie was born. Before that, we had a few weeks of him walking only if we sat on the floor and encouraged him. But once the baby came, it was game over. He became Jell-o legs. My mom came to town last week for a few days and she was watching the kids one evening. She text me while Paul and I were out saying they had a surprise for us when we got home. When Paul and I walked in the door, Garrett came walking toward us laughing. It was so exciting! My mom said she wasn't even trying to get him to do it. She was on the couch with Addie and he was standing playing with a toy. He turned and smiled and walked to her. And then back and forth for about 20 minutes. By the time we got home he was all over the place. Picking things up along the way, going from the ground to his feet without holding on to anything, and the kid is fast! So from the time he first walked, until we could finally say walking is his mode of transportation of choice, it was almost 3 months. Phew! But I think the walking is here to stay this time.

And Addie's big news. (I'm less excited about this one because I don't know if it's as permanent.) She's had over a week of sleeping 6+ hours at night! Usually she wakes up between 6 and a half and 7 hours to eat and go back to sleep, but we've had 2 nights of 8 hours straight! It's amazing what a full night sleep can do for a mom. Garrett was this same way at this age and so many people told me to prepare for the exact opposite because I couldn't be so lucky to have 2 good sleepers, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Day time naps are a different story. Often, but short. Until yesterday. Garrett is in Utah for a couple days and yesterday was our first full day of just Addie and I at home, and she napped long and peacefully. So maybe the loud noise called Garrett is the problem...

Here's a couple videos. (The first is right when Paul and I got home and saw him, which is why I sound so excited.)

{Not} Feeling Christmasy

2011-12-15T13:25:00.000-07:00

I told Paul we need to do some Christmas things because I'm just not feeling it this year. I'm not sad it's Christmas time, in fact, I'm pretty happy about Christmas, and I'm looking forward to the next couple weeks. It just doesn't feel like Christmas when you see more lit palm trees than pine trees, and you look for a shady spot at a Christmas parade.But so far all we've done is go to said parade, and go for one little drive to see a popular decorated house that wasn't decorated this year. But that's ok. We're staying plenty busy.

I told Paul several months ago that I'm not committing to anything this year and that it was going to be a low-key gift giving kind of year. So far, so good. But that doesn't mean I'm not busy! (besides the kids.) I made 11 dozen cupcakes in two days for work. I helped with food for a candle light service. I'm dipping 5 pounds of pretzels. I'm shopping for, and putting together a dozen or so gift baskets. I have a few more dozen cupcakes on the calendar in the next week. (all this for work.) AND, I'm getting gifts ready for Paul and the kids, and extended family, some I have to ship. Making holiday treats here and there for parties. Yesterday and today has been picture ordering day, (for gifts, grandparents love pics of their grandkids for Christmas), as well as Christmas and birth announcement designing, ordering, and addressing. Costco card templates won this year, nothing creative. But they'll all be in the mail by tonight! This weekend is wrapping gifts, finish up shopping, heading to the post office, family pictures with the White's, celebrating Christmas with the White's, a rehearsal dinner and wedding for some good friends. Sounds 'low-key' enough, right?

My baby is a month old today, A MONTH! We had some friends over a couple days ago and they said, what is she now, almost 2 weeks? Feels that way to me too! She's growing and doing well. I've talked to a couple friends in Utah the past few days who have asked what it's like having two. And my response is that I keep waiting for it to get hard, but so far it's been easier than I thought it would be. Sure I could use more sleep, I'm busy all the time, I clean up the same messes over and over all day, and I feel like adding one tiny persons wash has quadrupled my laundry. But it's not so bad. Going from one to two has been way easier for me than going from zero to one. I worry less. I don't second guess myself as much. And I really just focus on enjoying it. I have bad moments, and even bad days here and there. (Yesterday I text Paul and told him to hurry and remind me that it's a blessing to be a mom. And when my mother-in-law asked me last night what I did that day, I said, "tried to sell my kids on ebay.") But I love it. I won't be tired forever. And I won't have beautiful little kids who want to be with me every second forever. It's a blessing. Even when Addie spits up on my face at the same time that Garrett dumps a bowl of chicken noodle soup on his head... Little blessings... ;)

Paul was on Garrett duty. I know this looks staged, but I promise this is what I walked into both times.Garrett got his 6th haircut over the weekend. He's so shaggy.Sometimes I let Garrett lay in greasy pizza boxes and I just don't care.

Friday Photo Dump

2011-12-09T11:58:00.007-07:00

I've been meaning to blog for a few days now, but ya know, I just haven't. I have Christmas countdown blocks and every time I think to change them I'm behind at least two days, and I could swear I just changed them the day before. Time is flying by.

Both kids are asleep, well Garrett might not be, but he should be, so I'm pretending he is. So, I thought I'd put a few pictures up of the past couple weeks.

Playing at the park.Paul dressed Addie.I was rocking Addie and G came over and climbed up on my lap with a book. Sometimes he's fine when I hold her, other times he WILL NOT have it, unless I'm holding him too.I'll have to tell you sometime about how Garrett suddenly refuses to walk unassisted, now that Addie is here.I love when he's asleep and lets me hold him.I got my Christmas stuff up the day after Thanksgiving. I'm surprised, but Garrett has left it all alone for the most part. (The tags are on the stockings because they're new and I can't decide if I want them.) Paul dressed her again, headband and all. He loves those babylegs. She has about 20 pair, but he always picks those ones.Trying to entertain his sad sister.Bath time!Ready for the Company Christmas party.Twinners for the party.Garrett giving little sis a kiss.Sleeping baby.Garrett cleaning his highchair while I feed Addie.Things are going well. I got so sick one night I wanted to die. Cold sweats, dizzy, shaky. Paul slept in the guest room with Addie and Garrett's monitor and I had 9 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Amazing. Went to the doc the next day and I have mastitis. I'm on a 10 day antibiotic and am doing much better.

Addie is waking about every 3 hours at night and goes back to sleep after I feed her. Except last night, she was up A LOT and didn't want to go to sleep after eating. Hope it's not the start of something new.

Garrett is doing good. Sometimes a little emotional and has been fighting nap time, but it could be worse.

Paul and I have a Nature Sound app on our phone and ipad and Addie loves it! It's my favorite app at the moment, because it does good at drowning out Garrett's noise, and that's hard to do.

Well, I hear a baby...

New Baby Stuff

2011-11-30T22:34:00.000-07:00

I thought I had pretty much all I needed for baby #2. And I do. But here are a couple things that I need for her, that with G, I didn't need so much. And also, a couple "how did I live without this?" things.

A nursing cover. My sister-in-laws friend was a designer for Balboa Baby when I was pregnant with Garrett and she got me a sling and a nursing cover. Garrett hated the sling, and I haven't tried it with Addie yet. I also didn't need the cover for Garrett either, but I use it now and it's awesome. It's just about like any other nursing cover (I actually have two, a friend from church made me a cute one when Garrett was born.) But the things I love about the Balboa Baby cover are the strap adjuster. It's easy to adjust and it holds really well. The little pocket on the front, perfect for a burp cloth or bra pads, or a cell phone, or what ever. And the little pleats around the bottom. It stays closer to my body better, and also creates a nice little tent or bubble area for Addie to hang out under, and I'm hoping that it'll be harder for her to lift it up once she starts grabbing at things. I don't know if you can see all those things in the picture or not, but this is the one I have, and I love the fabric too. It's soft and cute.Medela Lanolin Cream. I don't remember what I used when I was pumping for Garrett, but it wasn't this, and I wish it would have been.A good pump. I rented a big heavy hospital grade pump for Garrett, and every time I pumped I felt like a cow in a barn hooked up to a milker machine. I hated every second of it. I'm not pumping a lot this time, mostly just if Addie has a sleepy feeding I'll pump a little after. But I love my new pump. It's light weight and easy to use/clean, and has a built-in lithium battery so I can pump in the car on road trips. It also came with a cut bag, a changing pad, and a little milk cooler. It's a Hygeia EnJoye.Born Free bottles. I don't know why I love them but I just do. Addie hasn't had many bottles, but if I pump, Paul feeds her the milk because he liked feeding Garrett and he misses it.Aden + Anais Swaddle Blankets. They are breathable, but warm and cozy, and they stay swaddled really well. I had one of them for Garrett, Addie has 8. They are kinda pricey. I paid 60 bucks for a 4 pack at a specialty store before I learned that Target now carries them. They are a couple inches smaller, but a 4 pack is only 40 bucks. I bought a pack from Target too, the smaller size works fine. They're still really big, they are not like the worthless 30 X 40 inch ones that only work until your baby hits 8 pounds.Nap Nanny Chill. This is my all time favorite purchase of the century. I know, right? Addie naps in this, sleeps in it at night, hangs out in it when she's awake, and Garrett even climbs in it when it's not occupied, and he loves it too. It looks so comfortable. I told Paul before Addie was born that I thought this would be a good idea to have, but I didn't know the price. When my mom got to town we headed to Babies R Us to check it out. I thought it would be 50 bucks or so. It's was $130 (!!). I went back and forth and decided to get it with the 20% off coupon, then I learned that you can't use the coupon on this item, so we left. Then 2 days later I went back. My mom helped out and we bought it. It's awesome and worth every penny! I wish I'd bought it when Garrett was born, and even now I sometimes wish I had two! Last night Addie slept for 5 hours straight in it! (I know, that's too long for a newborn to not eat, but I didn't wake up when I usually do, so I hurried and woke her and fed her.) But I have to admit, the 5 hour stretch was nice. I give all the credit to the Nap Nanny. (And a really good swaddle.)
I'm still debating about a baby carrier. We have a little cheap-o one that I feel like the baby isn't secure in. Paul put Garrett in it a couple weeks ago, and it really is secure, it just looks flimsy and I don't like it. We also have the Balboa Baby sling, but I don't think I'm a huge sling fan. And I have a Moby Wrap. I really like it, but I haven't mastered loading a baby in it when I alone. I've heard Ergo's are the best. Are they? Do you have one? Or do you have something else that you love?